Buffalo, NY – “We lost because of a damn coin flip.”

Does this phrase sound familiar? That’s probably because it is what Buffalo Bills fans have been wrestling with ever since the overtime playoff loss to the Kansas City Cheifs.

This is also the first line for the new “NFL Is Rigged Amendment Of 2022” that is currently being pushed through the local government in Buffalo, NY.

“Our hope is to prevent any future coin flip-related losses by outright banning all coinage city-wide,” said lawmaker Rob Johnson who also would like us to note that he’s not THAT Rob Johnson. “The ban will mean only paper currency can be used by residents and this also means NFL referees will not be able to use them to decide the future of a franchise.”

The bill will allow Buffalo citizens to turn in their coins at a centralized location where they will receive their value in cash. “All coins will be melted down and crafted into a statue of Josh Allen which will be displayed outside the stadium.”