Rochester, NY – Ever since the Coronavirus touched down in the United States, Rochesterians have been convinced that there is an even deadlier ailment around the corner: The Gennyvirus.

“I’m assuming it’s kind of like the Genny Screamers on steroids,” said local hypochondriac Chad Cheddington.  “Like brutal diarrhea, the sweats, awful drunk texts to your ex… The whole thing.”

Local health offices are so fed up with answering questions about a potential Gennyvirus that they’ve put out mass emails to all their patients to confirm that it does not exist and to please stop calling. They also stated for the record that switching to Genny Light will not help you avoid any future ailments.