Women’s Protest Over NY Declawing Ban Cancelled After Finding out It Does Not Involve White Claws

Rochester, NY – A large protest consisting mostly of local college-aged women had to be broken up outside of City Hall today after a misunderstanding led the women to believe that their go-to party beverage White Claw was banned in New York State.

“We heard that something about New York and de-claw-ing and we were already pretty tipsy off like four mango claws and we got pissed,” said Kelly Tortma a Saint John Fisher student.

Mayor Lovely Warren got onto the bullhorn at the protest to inform the women that they had confused the new Cat Declawing Ban with an outright ban on clawing.

The Mayor confirmed that she herself is more of a red wine drinker but is known to get her “claws-out” during BBQs and pool partys.

Disclaimer: White Claw did not pay us any money to write this article but they really should so if you know anyone that works at that fruity-burp factory tell them to write us a check. Thanks.

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