Wegmans Self Checkout Now Drains Entire Bank Account Automatically

Rochester, NY – Wegmans has introduced a new self-checkout system to make robbing you blindly as seamless as possible.

“We want to make shopping as easy as possible for our customers,” a Wegman’s representative told the Blog, “and we know waiting in line to spend your entire life savings is time-consuming.”

Wegmans shoppers were thrilled to learn they could waste all of their money at once.

“Finally, I can blow my whole paycheck on my Organic Kombucha Spirit Crystal Turmeric CBD and half a toothpick without waiting for an old lady to count her change.” One shopper told the Blog.

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