Scientists Confirm Height of Unbrushed Roof Snow, Related to How Disappointed Your Parents Are

Rochester, NY – A new study released by RIT Scientists has proven what we all kind of knew after years of driving during the winter in Rochester. Data confirms the height of snow left unbrushed on your vehicle is directly related to how disappointed your parents are in your life choices.

“I got the idea when I looked out into the campus parking lots and noticed a lot of cars with a foot tall pile of snow also had MAGA bumper stickers on them,” said lead researcher Josh Gore.

According to Gore, the higher the snow pile, the more likely the car owner’s parents were to distance themself from them. “Once you get to the delivery truck levels of snow that also fly off in sheets, and scaring the crap out of everyone behind them, their parents have just completely cut ties and in some cases even started new families.”

Interestingly, even just an inch of snow left unbrushed from a car’s roof meant nobody loved them.

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