Rochester, NY – It has been nearly a week since lawmakers in New York voted to repeal Gov. Andrew Cuomo’s mandate that people must order food with alcohol purchases and local bars are still scrambling to figure out what the hell they’re going to do with all their leftover snacks.
“I bought $30K of chips to sell to these alcoholics,” said one local bar owner. “Who buys chips at a bar if they’re not forced to?”
It’s because of this frustration that local business owners like this hero are erecting a giant plastic container downtown. Every bar with be dumping their entire stock of “Cuomo Chips” or “Cuomo Snacks” into the structure to create the world’s largest snack mix.
“Every Rochester resident will be allowed to drive-by and fill up their truck with snacks,” said one bar owner that wanted to remain anonymous. “Better get it before the seagulls figure out how to open the lid.”