Bills Hallmark Movie Rated NC 17 for Having “More Penetration Than Buffalo’s Defensive Line”

BUFFALO, NY – The new holiday romance movie currently filming in Buffalo has already shocked audiences and critics alike, becoming the first Hallmark film in history to receive an NC 17 rating.

The reason? It features what insiders are calling the network’s first-ever explicit sex scene. According to reports, the scene lasts nearly four minutes, includes full orchestral accompaniment, and features “more successful penetration than Buffalo’s defensive line has achieved in over a decade.”

Longtime Hallmark fans are divided. Some praise the network for finally evolving past awkward hand-holding and snowman-based flirting. Others feel the move is too drastic, with one viewer saying they prefer “the implication that the couple might have sexual relations” and if they wanted explicit content, they’d “just listen to their romance novel audiobooks with the bass turned up.”

Buffalo Bills fans, however, are unfazed. Many feel the scene is a fitting reflection of both the city and its football history. “There’s not much to do here in the winter, so yeah, it makes sense this Buffalo movie would have some hardcore stuff going on in the snow,” said one member of Bills Mafia. “And if you’ve watched the Bills lately, especially Josh Allen running for his life, are you really surprised this film includes a scene with no protection?”

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