Laval, Somewhere in Canada? – In a touching homage to their parent club the Buffalo Sabres, your Rochester Americans have bowed out of the AHL playoffs in embarrassing fashion, losing to Laval 5-0.

There were high hopes for this Amerks squad before the playoffs however as future Buffalo Sabres they showed themselves plenty prepared for the futility of the next level by losing in an extraordinarily pathetic display of ineptitude.

“Listen I know deep down this team can compete for a championship but we aren’t trying insult the big boys by making them feel worse about their drought that is old enough to smoke marb lights” said team captain Luka Rousek, as he perused a local menu for some decent poutine.