ROCHESTER, NY — Offices across Western New York buzzed Monday after the Buffalo Bills erased a 15-point fourth-quarter deficit to shock the Baltimore Ravens. Many fans left early, prompting quarterback Josh Allen to sigh to reporters, “That’s OK. We’ll be fine. But have some faith next time.”

Enter Ted Golonzo of Webster, who spent the entire workday bragging about going to the game and insisting that he’s no “soft fan” who “left early like a coward.” Colleagues, however, report that during the comeback, Golonzo was suspiciously active in the group chat “almost like they were comfortably in the passenger seat of their DD’s car, listening to the game on the radio.”

Adding to the doubt: the supposed diehard hasn’t yawned or touched a coffee all day, prompting office sources to wonder if anyone who actually stayed for the full game would have made it to work. Let alone survived the celebratory hangover without spending time in the unisex bathroom.