ROCHESTER, NY – Area radio executives announced today that November 3rd will be the day that Warm 101.3 employees will be pumping Christmas spirit directly into their anus.
“We’ve been bringing the joy of the holiday season to Rochester listeners for over three decades now,” wrote Marketing Director Allison Weir in a recent Facebook post. “This year to take it to the next level we are mandating that our employees take as much Bing Crosby music as possible directly to the anus, the holiday hit will be quicker and longer lasting”.
“I’m not really sure I like what they’re doing,” explained longtime Warm 101.3 listener Ruth Denger. “It’s not even Thanksgiving yet and we’re already expecting people to want accept holiday music into their rectum? I’m already sick of it to be honest!”
As of press time yesterday Warm 101.3 competitor Mix 100.5 announced that they plan on taking Christmas music “as hard as possible, into every orifice, for as long as it takes, and give full consent to be treated like the pigs we are,” beginning November 2nd:.