Pittsford, NY – This week the world found out that Julian Assange, the leader of WikiLeaks and man who looks like everyone’s Aunt, would be kicked out of the embassy in London where he has lived for more than six years.

In a panic, Assange reached out to every world leader he had in his contacts and Rochester’s most powerful entity, Wegmans, answered his plea.

The Pittsford Store Manager saw his message and assume it was the same old lady that constantly emailed to complain about the price of milk.

The store’s automated responds to emails states: “we are sorry for the inconvenience, we will do anything we can to help as customer service is important to us.”

Little did they know this stock phrase would put them into a binding agreement to house an enemy of the state.