Rochester Man Spits in the Face of God, Declares It’s “Going to Be a Mild Winter”

Rochester, NY – Adam Reginald from Webster has no meteorology degree but that hasn’t stopped him from declaring that the the winter of 2021 is set to be a mild one to everyone he makes small talk with.

“Someone told me that they heard it’s not going to be a snow filled year,” says Reginald. “I didn’t ask who exactly told them that, and I haven’t even done my own research, but since we didn’t have a white Christmas it makes sense to me!”

God has been taking notice of Rochesterians like Reginald who have been making declarations like this about the weather and told our Inner Loop writing staff via an intense weed-infused Boss Sauce trip that “these are famous last words.” Read into what you will but our visions also included images of Wegmans being closed due to blizzard conditions and a cloud that looked like middle-finger hovering over Kodak tower.

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