Following Government Loan Confusion, Kodak Confirms Your Dad Is Still Laid Off

Rochester, NY – Word has come down that Kodak’s $765 million government loan to produce key pharmaceutical supplies has been put on hold. After days of confusing reports on allegations of impropriety by company officials and stocks going up and down, the company has come forward to make one thing clear. “Your Dad is not getting his job back.”

The company reports they’ve received an influx of middle-aged to elderly adult Rochester men calling in saying “you told me that if something opened up, you’d give me a call” but according to a new press release they want to make it known that “all local Dad’s will not get hired.”

According to insider sources, The InnerLoop Blog can report that any new jobs that will come from the grant will be given to local mom’s in an effort to make sure Kodak can give equal opportunity to all genders when they eventually lay off this new round of staff in one to two years tops.

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