Barrel of Dolls Set Record Profits After Switch to Actual Sex Dolls

Rochester, NY – The Barrel of Dolls is known for shaking things up in the Village Gate area but their recent business decision has local economists stunned.

The gentlemen’s club decided to switch from employing real women to being more true to their name. The dancing staff is now completely made of plastic and silicone and the club is booming every night.

“I bought a Real Girl Doll online but noticed you get a good deal if you buy them in bulk,” said one of Barrel’s managers who wanted to remain anonymous for obvious reasons. “I figured how about instead of me ruining these things over the course of the next year, why not try to use them at the club and make some money back!”

The first show with Britany, a doll that is supposed to look like Britney Spears but looks more like a melted Christina Aguilera, had the club packed.

“They announced a new special show on their Instagram and I had to check it out,” said the Barrel Darel, a local strip club aficionado. “When they dragged out this lifeless sex doll on stage, I was kind of pissed, but then the show started, and I realized this was my kink.”

With the help of some rope, a few pullies, and drones, the sex dolls put on a choreographed show that no mortal could have ever pulled off. Their legs bend over their head, their fake boobs wrap around their entire body like a 12-year-old’s perverted drawing of an octopus, and they never get tired.

“The big plus is that until they gain sentience, we don’t have to worry about lawsuits,” said a Barrel representative. “It’s a game-changer.”

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