Rochester, NY – In a groundbreaking new study to determine the quality of the air in Rochester, scientists recently discovered that the air found behind the local bar LUX was actually composed of 95% weed smoke and farts.
“There is basically no oxygen left back there. Technically human life shouldn’t be able to survive in that environment, but the patrons of LUX seemed to have built up a tolerance to the air due to years of straight-up huffing farts and ripping fat bowls.” Said Dr. Jenkins McDerbles, who also noted that the bathrooms in LUX were actually composed mostly of solidified of cocaine at this point.
We found a patron of the bar who was ordering a “Cheeseburger Shot” to be directly shot into his veins when we asked what they thought of the new revelations he simply said “420 fart it!”
A statement that our employees here at The Inner Loop have been trying to decode for hours.