Rochester, NY – A deep carter is all that remains of Monroe County Executive Office after a showdown between Cheryl Dinolfo’s Hair and Record High Winds took place today.
Luckily The InnerLoop Blog was on the scene for the DragonBall-Z-like battle. Dinolfo had invited the press out to record and answer questions about an upcoming project when nearby wind gusts started to hit the area.
“It was as close to a tornado as we’re going to get in Western NY” said amateur storm chaser and local virgin Fred Halsen. Mr. Halsen was also on scene tracking the high-winds hoping to release some homemade “trackers” he fashioned out of soda cans like that scene from Twister.
“The wind was definitely ripping fast enough it could have torn the mailbox out of your yard. But I swear, her hair didn’t even budge!”
The wind hit Dinolfo’s hair and that amazing helmet stood strong like Superman taking a bullet. The entire press corps watched in amazement as Dinolfo continued her speech about the budget or some dumb shit completely unphased by the heavy gusts.
“We struggled to stay grounded. I had to hold onto a fire hydrant to stay but Cheryl didn’t move. It’s almost as it the aerodynamics of her head keep her locked into the ground like the wing of a Formula One car” said one Democrat & Chronicle Reporter.
When the fastest gust of wind hit Dinolfo’s head, a giant flash of light occurred, jarring all of us onlookers, but when came too, we saw Cheryl still unmoved, in the center of an Olympic swimming pool-sized carter.
Physicists will be studying this incident for years to come but believe that we have finally answered the question: “What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?”