Rochester, NY – Residents complaining about an unseasonably cool, wet May now have someone to blame: themselves. Local climate scientists sounded the alarm this week as a major greenhouse gas was discovered emanating from the butts of Garbage Plate consumers within the greater Rochester area.
“Methane is one of the most potent greenhouse gasses, and I worry this is only the beginning of our climate woes,” says local meteorologist Tracy Bensen. “We noticed a particularly high concentration of the gas above Nick Tahou’s and Dogtown, but now with Festival Season underway and with food trucks everywhere, the concern is this is going to be a runaway greenhouse effect.”
Fans of this gastrointestinal gauche are advised to avoid the dish at all costs. “If you must have a plate, consider ordering it without the sauce, or hold the beef,” says Bensen, adding “I hope you all love snow!”